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Friday, August 28, 2015

‘I Am A Liberal’

‘I Am A Liberal’

I am a Liberal.

I support the right to kill you for the first 9 months of your life and even a little bit afterward, if no one is looking.

I support gun free zones so you cannot defend yourself or anyone else if any of my disenfranchised brothers or sisters express their righteous rage.

I am against Wall Street and small business–especially if it is located in Ferguson, Missouri, or any other city where I decide racial injustice has been perpetrated.

I detest all you breeders who keep bringing in future generations who will be breathing my air.

I support bigger government and unlimited taxpayer-funded spending on gender bender hormones and other new needs of the day.

I say open the Southern gates and let future liberal voters in by the tens of millions to even the score, to have free and fair elections where anyone who arrives at a voting station can cast a private vote without identification.

And while we’re at it, let’s make Election Day a national holiday with polls only open 9 to 5.

I oppose all forms of private education and outlawing homeschooling. Let everyone get a public school education from pre-school to college graduation day, so we are all on the same page on the vital social issues of the day.

I’m for banning all forms of Judeo-Christian religion but also allowing Islam and secular humanism.

I’m for total 24/7 surveillance so that the business class pays their fair share.

I’m for merging America with the world for governance since sovereignty is so last-millennium.

I oppose Climate Change and am willing to sacrifice trillions of dollars of other people’s money to fight climate until it changes no more.

I am a Liberal. And I vote.

The views expressed in this opinion article are solely those of their author and are not necessarily either shared or endorsed by WesternJournalism.com.

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